By Karrbon Copy
So much controversy, so few laps for it all to happen…
And yet, they managed. Misano, once again didn’t fail to entertain.
Moto3:
First things first: let’s congratulate Fernandez on his hundredth Grand Prix start!
Now for the penalties. Cruces and Carpe were dropped down the grid by twelve places for going far too slowly on the racing line Saturday.
Carraro and Danish were ordered to line up at the back of the grid for the same reason, their punishment being more severe because they have yet to learn how to not be on the racing line and to be slow simultaneously.
Rios started the race with a Long Lap Penalty to his name, while Uriarte had twice as many.
If the opening lap of the race taught us anything, it was that a grid-position penalty is, essentially a jinx.
The first rider to fall victim to this suspected Misano-grid-penalty-curse was Carpe, who went for a sparky slide off-track at Turn Four. Although he managed to quickly remount, his fury tangible… his race was now properly ruined.
After the race, an ominous aura made the cameras shift their focus on Carpe’s arrival outside his garage. To say he was angry would be the understatement of the century: There was smoke coming from his ears, his footsteps stomped holes into the pavement.
Ten corners after Carpe’s tumble, Carraro got tangled up with Rammerstorfer. After a tumble-to-feet-and-back-down-again maneuver worthy of a professional circus clown act, Rammerstorfer also stomped away, his demeanour making it clear who was to blame.
In an attempt to make peace, Carraro fell to all fours in the gravel before Rammerstorfer, his forehead pressed to the pebbles.
Then, for a substantial number of laps, nothing catastrophic occurred. Just lots of entertaining racing action.
On Lap Sixteen, Esteban was seen walking away from his fallen machine, slow-clapping at someone who had clearly helped him off the track, but who had not left the track themselves.
We didn’t have to wait long to find out who the likely perpetrator had been, as Fernandez was handed a Long Lap Penalty for ‘causing a crash’.
With four laps to go, Quiles finally caught up with Almansa, the latter having led the entire race at that stage.
He managed to lead the whole race right up to the final fifteen-odd metres before the finish line.
Upon exiting the final corner, Almansa and Quiles were neck-to-neck, the finale to an epic final-lap tussle playing out as a drag race to the line. A drag race that Quiles ultimately won.
With less than a bike length to spare, Quiles snatched victory from underneath the nose of Almansa, who had to settle for a cruel second. Behind them, Uriarte crossed the line in third.
After having to avoid tripping over Carraro or Rammerstorfer when they clashed, Moodley finished in twenty-first.
Moto2:
More penalties… Mr Crafar & Co had a very busy weekend.
Guevara was penalised by six grid positions for being slow in Qualifying; Arbolino and Huertas was sent nine spots back each for the same offence, having offended more than Guevara.
To top off the penalties, Furusato was sent to the very back of the grid, likely for similar reasons.
Plot-twist of the month goes to this weekend’s Moto2 race. Hands down.
Nobody could have predicted what happened.
Entering the first corner for the first time, the front-row trio was swept from the track by a massive, invisible broom. Upon scrutinising the many replays, here’s what happened:
Piqueras was a little overzealous, diving to the inside of Holgado as they entered the corner. Physics said ‘nuh-uh’, and sent Piqueras sliding, which resulted in him tapping Holgado’s rear wheel, in turn sending him skidding off as well. Agius, innocently riding on their outside, was promptly taken along for the slide.
Sometime later, having given the others enough time to cool down ever so slightly, Piqueras went over to apologise.
Agius’ response was a heated lecturing which surely made Piqueras’ ears ring like midnight church bells.
Lap Two:
Lunetta crashed somewhere between the first and third turn. It was deemed not as important as the former crash, so we were not treated to a replay.
Zurutuza went for a short little slide at Turn Fourteen on the seventh lap, finding himself de-biked mid-track.
Approaching Turn Nine (or was it ten?) on Lap Nine, Salac suddenly checked his crotch before careening off through the gravel, not stopping until he reached the wall on the far end. Was it a technical problem?
Probably. Involving his crotch, though? We didn’t ask any further questions.
For the next few laps, it seemed as though everyone was trying to see how many times they could touch green paint without being slapped by the Penalty gods.
Four riders failed this task, and each received a Long Lap Penalty for their trouble. These were, in order of appearance: Munoz, Baltus, Rueda, and Garcia.
Nearing the end of the final lap, Gonzalez from his dominating lead risked a wave at his fans before finally crossing the finish line in a stand-up wheelie to claim the win. Over two seconds later, Veijer came in to take second, while Baltus ended up taking third, Long Lap and all.
During the Cooldown Lap, Gonzales sprinted off towards a toilet booth trackside. Reminiscent of a Rossi stunt, wasn’t it? But hey, if a man’s gotta go, a man’s gotta go.
MotoGP:
Surprise surprise! Bulega was spotted lurking openly around the paddock this weekend, his hair fit for a Garnier ad campaign. So glossy, so soft, so wavy.
There were two very white special liveries being run in San Marino this weekend. Both looked stellar. Both were ten-out-of-ten, should do again, creations. Gresini had done a Simoncelli tribute livery, while Aprilia went with a Gilles Villeneuve variant.
Allegedly, Mir had been ‘not well’ all weekend.
Sprint Race:
Bezzecchi nailed pole position with the first-ever one-minute-twenty-nine seconds lap time around the Misano circuit.
In the first few laps, we were treated to some good ol’ ‘rubbing is racing’ action as Acosta, Fernandez, and Aldeguer got physical in the fight over sixth.
On Lap Three, Quartararo tried diving down the inside of Moreira while they navigated into Turn Fourteen. It appeared that the Yamaha got scared by the proximity of the rival bike (or, perhaps, the other machine had mocked its ability to perform) and fell over, narrowly missing Moreira’s rear wheel as it slid across the track. Quartararo jogged after it, remounted, and swiftly rejoined the race.
You get a Track Limits Warning; you get a Track Limits Warning; everybody gets a Track Limits Warning!
At this stage, the race became the Marc versus Marco Show. Other riders who?
Marquez (Marc, who else?) claimed victory, leaving Bezzecchi in second place and still Sprint-winless this season. Third place went the way of Martin.
Further back, Binder managed to recover up to fourteenth.
During a grassy Cooldown Lap excursion to wave at his fans, Bezzecchi managed to lose his Italian flag. He didn’t even seem to notice.
Main Race:
Earlier over the weekend, rumours were spread (strategically) that the winner’s trophy had been stolen!
On Sunday, before to the race, three men jumped out of a military helicopter, descending to the track while trailing tricolore smoke. One of them pulled out a wrapped package, then quickly made his way to a waiting BMW, all the while looking like a ski-masked, stereotypical museum robber.
Upon his arrival at the grid, he walked over to the trophy stand, where he revealed himself to be multiple MX Champion and Ducati dirtbike developer, Antonio Cairoli.
The trophy was secured. The race could commence. It was all pretty beautiful!
Morbidelli was handed a single Long Lap Penalty after he was caught riding ‘dangerously slowly during the Friday practice.
Zarco, on the other hand, was clapped three spots backwards on the grid for impeding traffic.
During the very first lap, and directly in front of his home-fans grand stand between Turns Twelve and Thirteen, Bezzecchi threw it all in the dust.
His Aprilia won Drama Queen of the Day with its overly-dramatic tumble that ended with a slow tail-stand and a grand falling-over to its ultimate death…
Italians!
Though it had been a rather violent tumble, Bezzecchi seemed fine – in the physical sense.
Jack Miller slid off at turn eight on lap two, clinging to his bike like a cat to a slice of stolen pizza until he came to a stop and was able to lift his fallen motorcycle to its wheels so he could continue racing.
At the fourth turn, on Lap Three, Moreira went crashing out. After getting to his feet again, he trudged off. It was a definition trudge. The “trudgiest” trudge ever trudged in a MotoGP race.
By Lap Six, Bagnaia threw his Ducati across the grating gravel outside of Turn Two. Bits of bike were left like a trail of breadcrumbs through the gravel, ending at a positively demolished machine.
Sometime during the early stages of the race, Mir the Ill decided to tap out, disappearing into the pits and out of the race.
Around the seventh lap, Martin managed to snatch the lead from Marquez (Marc, duh), only for Marc to take it back by Lap Twelve. From that moment onward, Martin’s race kept getting worse by the lap.
At the end of Lap Twelve, Rins retired from the race.
Less than three laps from the checkered flag, Zarco’s bike abandoned him on the hard shoulder at Turn Eight. Zarco sat up, paused, then slowly got to his feet. Yeah, those latter stages of your thirties hit differently, don’t they, Johann?
While, compared to the other two classes, the MotoGP lot had very few penalties overall, Ravescattledilgloo did manage to earn himself a Long Lap Penalty near the end of the race.
Little surprise it was when Marquez, yes Marc took victory. As was almost a custom by now, the Other Marquez ended the race in second place. And in a show of mad mastercraft, Acosta claimed the third step.
How did Acosta not get voted Rider of the Day?! It’s all rigged, we say.
Binder, meanwhile, managed a decent enough eleventh. You’ve heard that he switches to BMW World Supes for 2027?
Good for Brad but it would be so cool to see what he can do with an all new bike.
Just for interest’s sake: After all the retirements, only fourteen riders crossed the finish line at the end of the twenty-seven-lap race. This meant that each and every finishing rider had earned more than one point.
See you for the next one!
